Customs and traditions-these two words are something really important to each one of us. If we carefully dig into the so called customs, unfortunately, many of them appear like evils and one amongst them is dowry! In fact, to those who understand that persons should not be judged, liked or treated based on how much they have, will come to a conclusion that there's an evil tradition in the society and to others who think they should follow that tradition (even if it appears evil) just to be on a safer land-by inviting troubles from in laws, they will compromise on the same.

Dowry is something similar to bride price (kanyashulkam-wherein bride's parents get money in exchange of their daughter's hand). If you think bride price is nothing but selling yourself to someone, dowry is also nothing but selling your dignity to someone who invites you into his life only if you shell out yellow metal, currency and a car (in many cases). Imagine a person, with whom you want to share the rest of your life, can't accept you as you are. Is it not a kind of demoralizing you, insulting you and damaging your self esteem? You alone know the answer.

In laws and other relatives might obviously question or comment if you don't bring dowry. But should that really worry you? As long as your husband supports you, nothing should really put you down. Giving dowry only with a notion that you can buy peace from in laws would simply mean degrading yourself. We have thousands of cases wherein  brides were burnt even after dowry was offered. Do you have an answer to this if buying peace is your only justification?

If you are an educated woman, it is not just your duty to say that you won't give dowry, but educate the other women that one should resist this so called tradition. Until women take the lead and raise the voice against this ill tradition, dowry will not be uprooted.  Friends, you should never let yourself be treated like someone who will bring in lots of money. People who find happiness in the money you bring will never care about the smile on your face. Fight the dowry system, raise your voice and take an oath right away that you won't give dowry! If at least one person understands our efforts to uproot dowry and takes an oath to educate women on dowry, then we consider our efforts as successful.

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(AW: Phani)