Newly married??? Make your first year of marriage the BEST....
You might have come across all those friends and people who you know talking about the first few years of marriage to be terrible, due to the process of adapting yourself in accordance with your partner, in-laws, new set of rules and regulations, un learn some things, change your habits and living to certain or a major extent and most important, living away from your parents and all these year of your life before marriage.
On contrary, marriage is also a bliss and especially the first year of marriage can be great, if you think of working on it… the following aspects might help you as your guidelines of dealing with the first year of marriage towards the BEST;
You are a partnership; 50/50
If you come into a marriage with archaic notions of 50’s relationships you will not get very far. Men are no longer the hairy hunters, women do not need to be tied to a stove. Just try and remember that if you come home from work one day and the house is a mess and dinner isn’t made. If you have kids, your wife may have spent all day chasing after them. If your wife works, her day most likely sucked as badly as yours. Even if your wife is just at home all day, she’s not obliged to be your servant.Sometimes you cook and clean, sometimes she does. It’s 50/50.
Sex is important
It’s not everything, but to say it doesn’t play a huge role is fooling yourself. After all, it was physical attraction that most likely brought you together. If you have differing sex drives, that can be rough. Work out a schedule that makes sure you get what you need and so does your partner. And sometimes affection doesn’t have to lead to sex. It’s fine to kiss and cuddle guys. its important that your partner should know you care for him and this is only possible with your body language and actions rather than talking about your love towards him.
Learn to suck it up and say sorry.
I learned my lesson way too late on this one. Regardless of who started the argument, saying sorry is an easy way to end it. Most likely you were pretty insensitive during the course of the argument and said some nasty things anyway. But when you do apologize, make sure you know what you’re apologizing about. Saying sorry is hard enough for most people, but if her rebuttal is “what are you sorry about” you don’t ever want to answer that with “ummm, whatever it is I did.” That’s a night on the sofa right there.
Remember to make time for each other.
Once you’re married it’s very easy to forget each other’s needs. Making time does not mean putting on a TV show or a movie and sitting on the sofa for 3 hours (although sometimes that’s nice.but not every night). Make time for dates. This is especially important when you have kids. You got married because you wanted to spend the rest of your lives together. All too often we fall into a pattern of just surviving day today, rather than living and enjoying each other. he is your best friend and your lover. he deserves your full attention, and vice versa.
Don't let the in-laws make your life hell.
Before your husband started his life with you, he had another life. Just don’t let anyone enter between you both and this should be inculcated by you right in the beginning. Just remember the most important person in your life now is your partner. You can’t pick your parents, you did pick each other. And you’ll hopefully spend the rest of your lives together.
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